I’m on a jetty swaying gently from the motion of the waves, watching the sun set, sea all around me. Some Asian music is playing and a flock of birds is skimming over the waves as the sun reaches ever so slowly down to kiss the sea.It’s beautiful.
I realised by accident that it is green that gives me life. In the same way that bustling cities do it for some others. Green – leaves, flowers…greenness, literally fills me with life. So does the sea. Something I never knew till my trip to Mauritius earlier this year. The vastness of it, the endless motion, it speaks to me. I could gaze at it for ages. I’m in a resort where the first sight out of my windows is a sea of green grass, dotted with coconut palms, leading to the sea. The air is quiet and time slows down. And I have slowed down right along with it.
I also realised, but not by accident, that I am, not a nomad, but a traveller. Few things thrill me more than packing a bag and going somewhere. Unless it’s the joy of coming back home, until it’s time to go again. I’ve unlocked something with this trip, and I already know where I want to go next year. I remember when I used to pick a place at the beginning of the year. I’d plan, select a hotel, activities and then put it aside because there was no way I could afford it. I planned this trip almost without thinking about it. And it didn’t hit me till I was on the plane, taking off, that I was doing what I’d always dreamed of. And I realised again how far I have come. Then I thought of all the huge dreams I now have, and I smiled at where I’m headed, of all the space for the miraculous that I inhabit.
I realised that no matter how hard you work and how passionate you are about what you do, you must every so often, step out of the loop. Not just for the rest – though that is necessary, but for the chance to recharge, to replenish all that you have given out, to break ruts and see things differently. to gain perspective, to remember.
I watched a couple today, perhaps in their 50s. An accidental glance in their direction saw them passionately kiss, next time I looked, she was showing him something she was making from coconut palms. By this time I was intrigued – a glance later was him leaning on her, both of them with eyes closed, then talking, then sharing a smoke, then fetching things for each other. As they walked away, she said something to him, he looked at her and put his arms around her. I realised that few things are better than sharing your life with someone who you can really share your life with – the moments of talk and silence and passion. I realised that too few people have enough of that.
I watched the sun go down, bit by bit. I watched it slip lower and lower below the clouds. I lost myself in its beauty and in its promise. And when it was gone, I found myself so full that all I could do was smile at the sea. I realised how content I am, how complete I am, how blessed I am. Life has many moments of heart stretching beauty, and that it was a blessing to catch this one.
I will spend the next few days resting and recharging, Filling up again. Communing silently. Thinking about nothing at all. Dreaming. Reading. Exploring. I will spend them Being Grateful. And just Being. And it will be wonderful